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Scoring the Assertive Woman

17 Jul 2014
Personal Dating Coach
a bit of dirty talk, approach her, asking her out, old missionary position, shy lady

There’s nothing quite like a lady who knows who she is, what she wants, and how she’s going to get it. It can be daunting to approach such a self-assured woman. After all, what if she’s way out of your league, or laughs you off the second you open your mouth?

Attitude is Everything

“Never beg her to be with you”

“Never beg her to be with you”

It may surprise you to hear that it’s confidence that will get you an assertive woman, just like it would a more shy lady. Just because she’s confident herself doesn’t mean she wants a man who’s a doormat. This isn’t to say that you’re out of luck if you’re a quiet or easygoing type of guy. You just need to be self-assured enough to keep up with her personality.

The first step to being confident is looking confident, so clean yourself up. Dress sharply and stand up straight, look her in the eyes while talking, and don’t mumble while speaking. These little things will help you get more into a confident state of mind if you’re not there naturally. Fake it until you make it.

Do approach her, and do strike up a conversation. Letting the lady do the talking and asking her questions about herself is always good advice no matter who you’re chatting with is always good advice, but it goes double here. She’s probably dealt with enough guys who try to talk over her, or insult her for her forward personality. You being respectful of her will get you a long way. Being able to let her lead conversations and make decisions shows a level of maturity and confidence that most men don’t have.

That being said, women don’t like always having to be the ones to take control and make plans, no matter how assertive they are. Show your confidence by asking her out directly and specifically. “Hey, I’m interested in biking too, let’s go out this Saturday to this one park near me” will get you way farther than “let’s go out for coffee sometime”. The latter one is vague and wishy-washy, easily forgettable, and doesn’t show that you’ve really put much effort in getting to know her interests, or that you’re interested in those things too. Even if she’s got other plans on Saturday, the more direct question will let you reschedule as needed, and will stick in her mind more than some vague promise of coffee later.

Attitude is Definitely Everything in Bed

“Suggest her new positions to try”

“Suggest her new positions to try”

You might think that assertive attitude of hers will make her great in bed, and you would be right. Her self-assurance won’t evaporate the second she’s out of her clothes, so you’ll want to be comfortable in a non-leadership position in the bedroom. Nevertheless, you’ll want to bring that confidence of yours to the bedroom as well. While she’ll probably tell you exactly what she wants and what she wants to do to you, don’t just lay there like a dead fish and don’t stick to the boring old missionary position. Her confidence probably extends to things in the bedroom, so you’ll likely be safe asking her to ride you, or asking for a bit of dirty talk or light bondage to spice up the mood.

About the Author
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